I Feel Small

I feel small, insignificant. My mind becomes cluttered and confused. I want to reach out, yell here I am. I survived, I made it. But I don’t want anyone to know. I don’t want to tell. I am afraid. I am tired of being afraid. I don’t want to be alone or hurt anymore but I feel too vulnerable to reach out. I want to talk to tell someone but I don’t want to overwhelm or bore another with my problems. I don’t want people to think that I am broken or weak. I want them to see that I am strong a survivor but I won’t tell. Why can’t my strength be seen without having to let everyone know I struggled. I know others have struggled and I don’t know their story. I do know they are strong by their actions. Do my actions not fit the way I feel? I think that is possible. I tend to be shy. I’m worried someone might see what happened to me. I know that there are those who guess. So maybe it is me who doesn’t feel strong so I assume others don’t think I’m strong. My mind is my own worse enemy.

 

By, TJP

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