Hiding

So much she has given up

Much more she has lost

Seeking safety

Fighting for acceptance

Praying for love

Her heart searches

Her voice calls out

Only when she is alone

Do her tears fall

Rather than to be seen as weak

She prefers they think she is crazy

Desperate to protect her heart

Longing to open up to another

Never trusting

Always fearing

Forever locked inside her own mind

 

By, TJP

 

“I know it may not mean much to you , but I married you …. To me that means a LOT”

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I wonder every time you say that

You think marriage doesn’t mean the same to me

The rest of our lives was exactly what I was fighting for

Do you think I married you for what

Your money

The pretty dress

You didn’t have a job when I agreed to marry you

I wanted to get married in front of a judge

Do you think I didn’t love you enough to stay

No, I stayed as long as I thought you still loved me

You no longer showed love

What exactly is it that you think

That my decision to marry you

Couldn’t possibly mean as much to me as it did to you

It’s not as sacred to me

I don’t want to continue our marriage

That does not mean that it was not special to me

It does not mean that your depth of emotion is greater than mine

I may not have been strong enough to continue

Do not doubt how I felt

Do not doubt that I meant to spend the rest of our time together

I am sorry my strength failed

Do not doubt that I did love you

By, TJP 

 

She Is Missed

Forever missed

Never good enough until she is gone

Sweet and kind

Giving and strong

She loves them all

They don’t see her until she is gone

Forgiving and grateful

She only requires your time

Always waiting

Not loved until she is gone

 

By, TJP

 

My Sweater

Alone in my room

Wearing nothing but a top

I pull on my thickest sweater and warmest socks

Tucking myself into my pillows

The TV serves only as background noise to the thoughts in my head

I am not lonely, tearful or sad

Anger is gone the fear has passed

Not yet empty but no longer full

Seeking comfort I can’t get from you

My future has options so much I can choose

 

By, TJP